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For example, a question might ask, "If you found your partner cheating on you would you be more upset by A the sexual involvement or B the emotional involvement".

Many studies using forced choice questionnaires have found statistically significant results supporting an innate sex difference between men and women.

Although forced-choice questionnaires show a statistically significant sex-difference, critics of the theory of evolved sex differences in jealousy question these findings.

In consideration of the entire body of work on sex differences, C. Harris asserted that when methods other than forced-choice questionnaires are used to identify an innate sex difference, inconsistencies between studies begin to arise.

The results of these studies also depended on the context in which the participants were made to describe what type of jealousy they felt, as well as the intensity of their jealousy.

In her meta-analysis, Harris raises the question of whether forced choice questionnaires actually measure what they purport: jealousy itself and evidence that differences in jealousy arise from innate mechanisms.

According to Harris, a meta-analysis of multiple types of studies should indicate a convergence of evidence and multiple operationalizations.

This is not the case, which raises the question as to the validity of forced-choice studies. DeSteno and Bartlett further support this argument by providing evidence which indicates that significant results of forced-choice studies may actually be an artifact of measurement; this finding would invalidate many of the claims made by those "in favor" of an "innate" sex difference.

These inconsistent results have led researchers to propose novel theories that attempt to explain the sex differences observed in certain studies.

One theory that has been hypothesized to explain why men and women both report more distress to emotional infidelity than sexual infidelity is borrowed from childhood attachment theories.

Studies have found that attachment styles of adults are consistent with their self-reported relationship histories. The authors propose that a social mechanism may be responsible for the observed results.

In other words, replicable sex differences in emotion and sexual jealousy could be a function of a social function. Similar studies focusing on the masculinization and feminization by society also argue for a social explanation, while discounting an evolutionary explanation.

A study found a correlation between AVPR1A expression and predisposition to extrapair mating in women but not in men. Evolutionary researchers have suggested that men and women have innate mechanisms that contribute to why they become sexually jealous, especially for certain types of infidelity.

Symons determined that sexual jealousy is the major reason that many homosexual men are unsuccessful in maintaining monogamous relationships [30] and suggests that all men are innately disposed to want sexual variation, with the difference between heterosexual and homosexual men being that homosexual men can find willing partners more often for casual sex, and thus satisfy this innate desire for sexual variety.

Peplau and Cochran found that sexual exclusivity was much more important to heterosexual men and women compared to homosexual men and women.

This theory suggests that it is not sexuality that may lead to differences but that people are prone to jealousy in domains that are especially important to them.

Harris tested these hypotheses among individuals: 48 homosexual women, 50 homosexual men, 40 heterosexual women, and 49 heterosexual men.

Heterosexuals rated emotional and sexual infidelity as more emotionally distressing than did lesbian and gay individuals. Sex and sexual orientation differences emerged regarding the degree to which specific emotions were reported in response to sexual and emotional infidelity.

Few researchers have explored the influence of sexual orientation on which type of infidelity is viewed as more distressing. Summarizing the findings from these studies, heterosexual men seem to be more distressed by sexual infidelity than heterosexual women, lesbian women, and gay men.

Some studies suggest that only a small percentage of couples that experience infidelity actually improve their relationship, whereas others report couples having surprisingly positive relationship outcomes.

The negative impact of infidelity on a relationship depends on how involved partners are in their infidelity relationship, and researchers maintain that infidelity itself does not cause divorce but the overall level of relationship satisfaction, motives for infidelity, level of conflict, and attitudes held about infidelity do.

If divorce results from infidelity, research suggest that the "faithful" spouse may experience feelings of low life satisfaction and self-esteem; they may also engage in future relationships fearful of the same incidence occurring.

Infidelity causes extreme emotions to occur between males and females alike. Emotions have been proven to change through this process.

Below, the three phases of infidelity beginning, during and after are explained. Infidelity is the biggest fear in most romantic relationships and even friendships.

No individual wants to be cheated on and replaced by another, this act usually makes people feel unwanted, jealous, angry and incompetent.

The initial stage of the infidelity process is the suspicious beginning; the stage in which it has not been proven, but warning signs are beginning to surface.

While suspicion is not hard evidence in infidelity and cannot prove anything, it does affect a person's affective emotions and cognitive states.

Jealousy, the feeling of incompetence, and anger can all be felt in both the affective and cognitive states of emotions; infidelity has a different impact in each of those connected states.

Affective emotions and response are a primary factor in the initial stages of infidelity on both sides. Affective behaviors are how we deal with emotions that we do not anticipate.

An affective response immediately indicates to an individual whether something is pleasant or unpleasant and whether they decide to approach or avoid a situation.

To begin, affective emotions and the effect infidelity has on affective jealousy. Both men and women alike feel some kind of jealousy when they suspect their significant other is being unfaithful.

If some individual suspects that he or she is being cheated on they begin to question their partner's actions and may possibly act in more frustrated ways towards them than they normally would.

The affective use of jealousy in a seemingly unfaithful relationship is caused by the accusing partner anticipating the infidelity from the other.

Another affective emotion in this beginning stage is incompetence. Feeling incompetent can spring from multiple things in a relationship, but during the initial stages of infidelity, a person can experience this on an increased level.

When someone is having incompetent feelings due to someone else's actions they begin to resent them, creating a build-up and eventually an affective emotion outburst over something small.

The faithful partner is not normally aware that their suspicion is the reason they feel incompetent in the relationship and do not expect to be so irritated by the change of simple things; making it an affective response in this stage of infidelity.

An additional affective response or emotion seen in initial infidelity is anger. Anger is an emotion that is felt in all stages of infidelity, but in different ways and at different calibers.

In the initial stages of infidelity anger is an underlying emotion that is usually exposed after the buildup of other emotions such as jealousy and Resentment.

Anger is noticed to be a key emotion within a situation like infidelity, it takes on many roles and forms throughout the process but in the initial stage of cheating, anger can be an affective emotion because of how unpredictable and rapid it can happen without thinking of one's actions and feelings before doing so.

Cognitive emotions and states tend to be felt in the initial stages of infidelity whenever the faithful partner is alone or left alone by the suspected unfaithful one.

Cognitive emotions and responses are that of those in which an individual anticipates them. To begin with cognitive responses in infidelity, individuals who have been cheated on experience jealousy cognitively for many reasons.

They may feel that their partner has lost interest in them and feel that they cannot compare to the persons with whom they are being cheated on with.

Therefore, they anticipate the loss of their partner's emotional interest in them and become jealous for more clear reasons. The anticipation of jealous feelings towards an individual's significant other causes a cognitive response, even without the burden of proof.

Some more cognitive responses in the young stages of infidelity are incompetence and resentfulness. In the initial stages of infidelity, the feeling of incompetence can lead to cognitive resentment.

The partner being cheated on will begin to feel that anything and everything they do is not enough, they may feel incompetent in the ways of love, affection, or sex.

Whenever an individual suspects that they are being cheated on they try to change their behavior in hopes of keeping or getting their partner's attention back onto themselves instead of on the person whom they are having another relationship with.

People cheat for many reasons and each of those can cause a faithful person to believe they are not competent enough to be in a romantic relationship.

This feeling leads to the resentment of the unfaithful partner's actions and becomes an ongoing emotion throughout the stages of infidelity instead of simply being a quick and immediate response to a partner's actions.

Lastly, anger in infidelity is quite inevitable. In the initial stage of infidelity, anger is not as apparent as it is seen in stage two, because there is not hard facts or evidence supporting one's suspicions.

As previously talked about, the accuser most likely feels jealous and incompetent in the first stage of cheating. These emotions can contract into anger and provide a cognitive state of anger because the accusing person anticipates his or her anger.

Unlike jealousy and resentment, it is hard to identify the purpose or cause of the individual's anger because in reality there is nothing yet to be angry about, there is no proof of their romantic partner's unfaithfulness.

It is hard to pinpoint the anger emotion in the initial stages due to ambiguity; therefore, it begins to take on other emotions turning into a cognitive state of emotional turmoil.

The individual knows they are angry and anticipates it, but cannot logically explain it to their partner because of the lack of evidence they have.

Infidelity, perhaps the worst relational crime, is defined as the action or state of being unfaithful to a romantic partner.

The victim of the crime can experience long-lasting emotional damage as a result. Relationships give people a sense of belongingness and contributes to self-esteem.

According to the Attachment theory , intimates develop mental representations of the availability of close others that lead to strong cognitive and behavioral patterns of responding to those others.

Those who develop a more secure attachment style believe others are available to them and behave accordingly, those who develop an insecure attachment tend to believe others are less available to them and behave accordingly.

Those types of people cope by seeking reassurance and clinging themselves to another person. These types of insecurity can be related to marital infidelity.

The effects of your partner's unfaithfulness can cause an emotional trauma. It is a painful experience that only creates negative emotional effect s.

Gender self-esteem greatly affects infidelity. The cause of these different jealousy's have developed over time due to evolutionary changes.

A study was conducted to determine if men and women actually base their self-esteem on different contingencies. There were a total of 65 participants, 33 men and 32 women.

They were asked questions regarding their self-worth and told to answer them on a scale of importance to them.

The study did indeed prove their hypothesis. It proved that sex was more relevant to men than to women and being in a healthy emotional relationship was more important to women than to men.

Those who are cheated on experience a great amount of anxiety, stress and depression. Shrout was among researchers who conducted a study based on the hypothesis that people experiencing those emotions because of an infidelity are more likely to engage in activities that are a health risk.

The experiment Shrout and her colleagues conducted validated their hypothesis, showing a direct link between emotions caused by infidelity and an increase in dangerous behaviors.

Being cheated on seems to not only to have mental health consequences, but also increases risky behaviors. The study examined the link between the emotional distress caused by infidelity and health-compromising behaviors, perception of blame and self-esteem, and the differences in the reactions of men and women.

Not only did they prove the connection between the distress and risky behavior, but they also found that those who blamed themselves for their partners unfaithfulness were also more like to participate in risky behavior.

The researchers proved the more distress you feel the more likely the individual is to take part in unhealthy acts and the more the victim blamed themselves the more distress they experienced.

Shrout's study concluded that women who experienced negative appraisals, like self-blame and causal attribution, led to emotional distress and increased health-compromising behavior.

However, women are more affected than men. This is due perception; women perceive relationships as more of a priority and are usually more emotionally attached.

Shrout and her team in Reno's initial hypothesis was proven: not only do victims of infidelity experience emotional trauma, but that trauma leads to more risky actions or behaviors.

In addition to the behaviors first examined, such as depriving themselves of food and nutrients, consuming alcohol or using drugs more often, increased sexual activity, having sex under the influence of drugs or alcohol or over-exercising, people also felt a loss of trust that expands beyond romantic relationships.

Victims can become strained from their family members. Several emotions are present after the act of infidelity. Jealousy is a common emotion after infidelity.

The definition of jealousy is the feeling or showing suspicion of someone's unfaithfulness in a relationship or losing something or someone's attention.

Individual differences were predictors of jealousy, which differed for men and women. Predictors for men were sex drive, attachment avoidance and previous acts of infidelity.

Predictors for women were sex drive and relationship status. Attachment and sexual motivations likely influence the evolved jealousy mechanism.

Men responded with greater self-reported jealousy and psychological distress when imagining their partner in Extra-pair copulation , whereas, women were more upset by the thoughts of an emotionally unfaithful partner.

Group differences were also found, with women responding with stronger emotions to emotional and sexual infidelity than men.

Heterosexuals valued emotional and sexual infidelity as more emotionally draining than homosexuals individuals did.

Summarizing the findings from studies, heterosexual men seem to be more distressed by sexual infidelity than heterosexual women, lesbian women, and gay men.

After infidelity stress was present. The imbalance causes jealousy in unfaithful relationships and jealousy remained after the relationship concluded.

Women displayed an insecure long-term mating response. Lack of self-worth is evident after the infidelity in the daily life and involvement.

Studies have found that men are more likely to engage in extramarital sex if they are unsatisfied sexually, while women are more likely to engage in extramarital sex if they are unsatisfied emotionally.

Anthropologists tend to believe humans are neither completely monogamous nor completely polygamous. Anthropologist Bobbi Low says we are "slightly polygamous"; while Deborah Blum believes we are "ambiguously monogamous," and slowly moving away from the polygamous habits of our evolutionary ancestors.

According to anthropologist Helen Fisher, there are numerous psychological reasons for adultery. Some people may want to supplement a marriage, solve a sex problem, gather more attention, seek revenge, or have more excitement in the marriage.

But based on Fisher's research, there also is a biological side to adultery. Often, gender differences in both jealousy and infidelity are attributable to cultural factors.

This variation stems from the fact that societies differ in how they view extramarital affairs and jealousy. Therefore, when an individual feels jealousy towards another, it is usually because they are now sharing their primary source of attention and satisfaction.

However, variation can be seen when identifying the behaviors and actions that betray the role of primary attention satisfaction giver. For instance, in certain cultures if an individual goes out with another of the opposite gender, emotions of intense jealousy can result; however, in other cultures, this behavior is perfectly acceptable and is not given much thought.

It is important to understand where these cultural variations come from and how they root themselves into differing perceptions of infidelity.

While many cultures report infidelity as wrong and admonish it, some are more tolerant of such behaviour. These views are generally linked to the overall liberal nature of the society.

For instance, Danish society is viewed as more liberal than many other cultures, and as such, have correlating liberal views on infidelity and extramarital affairs.

In Danish society, having sex does not necessarily imply a deep emotional attachment. As a result, infidelity does not carry such a severe negative connotation.

The cultural difference is most likely due to the more restrictive nature of Chinese society, thus, making infidelity a more salient concern.

Sexual promiscuity is more prominent in the United States, thus it follows that American society is more preoccupied with infidelity than Chinese society.

Even within Christianity in the United States , there are discrepancies as to how extramarital affairs are viewed. For instance, Protestants and Catholics do not view infidelity with equal severity.

The conception of marriage is also markedly different; while in Roman Catholicism marriage is seen as an indissoluble sacramental bond and does not permit divorce even in cases of infidelity, most Protestant denominations allow for divorce and remarriage for infidelity or other reasons.

Ultimately, it was seen that adults that associated with a religion any denomination were found to view infidelity as much more distressing than those who were not affiliated with a religion.

Those that participated more heavily in their religions were even more conservative in their views on infidelity. Some research has also suggested that being African American has a positive correlation to infidelity, even when education attainment is controlled for.

For example, Schmitt discusses how tribal cultures with higher pathogen stress are more likely to have polygynous marriage systems; whereas monogamous mating systems usually have relatively lower high-pathogen environments.

Strategic pluralism is a theory that focuses on how environmental factors influence mating strategies. According to this theory, when people live within environments that are demanding and stressful, the need for bi-parental care is greater for increasing the survival of offspring.

Correspondingly, monogamy and commitment are more commonplace. On the other hand, when people live within environments that encompass little stress and threats to the viability of offspring, the need for serious and committed relations is lowered, and therefore promiscuity and infidelity are more common.

Sex ratio theory is a theory that explains the relationship and sexual dynamics within different areas of the world based on the ratio of the number of marriage-aged men to marriage-aged women.

According to this theory, an area has a high sex ratio when there is a higher number of marriage-aged women to marriage-aged men and an area has a low sex ratio when there are more marriage-aged men.

On the other hand, when sex ratios are low, promiscuity is less common because women are in demand and since they desire monogamy and commitment, in order for men to remain competitive in the pool of mates, they must respond to these desires.

Support for this theory comes from evidence showing higher divorce rates in countries with higher sex ratios and higher monogamy rates in countries with lower sex ratios.

While infidelity is by no means exclusive to certain groups of people, its perception can be influenced by other factors.

Furthermore, within a "homogeneous culture," like that in the United States, factors like community size can be strong predictors of how infidelity is perceived.

Larger communities tend to care less about infidelity whereas small towns are much more concerned with such issues.

For example, a cantina in a small, rural Mexican community is often viewed as a place where "decent" or "married" women do not go because of its semi-private nature.

Conversely, public spaces like the market or plaza are acceptable areas for heterosexual interaction. A smaller population size presents the threat of being publicly recognized for infidelity.

However, within a larger community of the same Mexican society, entering a bar or watering hole would garner a different view.

It would be deemed perfectly acceptable for both married and unmarried individuals to drink at a bar in a large city. These observations can be paralleled to rural and urban societies in the United States as well.

According to a survey of 16, individuals in 53 countries by David Schmitt , mate poaching happens significantly more frequently in Middle Eastern countries such as Turkey and Lebanon , and less frequently in East Asian countries such as China and Japan.

The parental investment theory is used to explain evolutionary pressures that can account for sex differences in infidelity. This theory states that the sex that invests less in the offspring has more to gain from indiscriminate sexual behaviour.

This means that women, who typically invest more time and energy into raising their offspring 9 months of carrying offspring, breast feeding etc.

Men on the other hand, have less parental investment and so they are driven towards indiscriminate sexual activity with multiple partners as such activity increases the likelihood of their reproduction.

It can however, still account for the occurrence of extradyadic sexual relationships among women. For example, a woman whose husband has fertilization difficulties can benefit from engaging in sexual activity outside of her relationship.

She can gain access to high-quality genes and still derive the benefit of parental investment from her husband or partner who is unknowingly investing in their illegitimate child.

One defense mechanism that some researchers believe is effective at preventing infidelity is jealousy. Jealousy is an emotion that can elicit strong responses.

Cases have been commonly documented where sexual jealousy was a direct cause of murders and morbid jealousy. These suggestions are: [64]. Looking at jealousy's physiological mechanism offers support for this idea.

Additional surveys indicate that perhaps only 35 percent of unions survive a cheating spouse. It is estimated that sixty five percent of marriages break up because of adultery with the primary reason being emotional affairs.

Surveys agree that many affairs begin in the workplace.. Married men probably still stray more often than married women—perhaps from 50 percent to 65 percent by the age of forty.

Some experts in the field have said that a gut instinct is the most powerful indicator of a cheating lover. Unspecified adultery statistics have stated that 85 percent of woman who feel their lover is cheating are correct and 50 percent of men who feel their lover is cheating are right.

The first clue to identifing cheaters is seldom obvious. Typically, it's a "feeling" that something is different. Various cheating spouse statistics have indicated that between 50 and 70 percent of married men between 38 and 53 million men have cheated or will cheat on their wives.

Surveys vary but one study found that approximately two thirds of the wives 26 to 36 million women whose husbands were cheating had no idea their husbands were having an affair - largely because they failed to recognize various telltale signs.

The good news, however, is that the majority of marriages not only survive infidelity, but marriage and family therapists have observed that many marriages can become stronger Is Your Relationship at Risk?

By Norine Dworkin-McDaniel "Hillary Clinton became the symbol of long-suffering married women everywhere when she famously stood by her man… twice.

She gets a private email account, posts a profile at LonelyCheatingWives. Frank Gunzburg "Right now, you are probably feeling as though someone has either punched you in the stomach, stabbed you in the back -- or even both.

Finding out your spouse has cheated is like a crazy cocktail of anger, denial, grief Infidelity Discovered? Robert Huizenga , The Infidelity Coach "When you find out about the affair, the first few hours, days and weeks can be emotionally wrenching Robert Huizenga , The Infidelity Coach "One kind of extramarital affair revolves around sexual addiction.

The partner involved in the affair, plain and simple, has a difficult time saying "NO. Online relationships in our homes most impacts couples by the formation of new relationships developed via the Internet.

Virtual or online communities allow strangers from all over the world to meet instantly 24 hours per day, seven days a week.

Change in sleep patterns - Chat rooms and meeting places for cybersex don't heat up until late at night, so the cheating partner tends to stay up later and later to be part of the action.

Often, the partner suddenly begins coming to bed in the early-morning hours, may leap out of bed an hour or two earlier and bolt to the computer for a pre-work e-mail exchange with a new romantic partner may explain things.

If someone begins an affair whether online or offline they will go to great lengths to hide the truth from their partner. With a cyberaffair, this attempt usually leads to the need for greater privacy and secrecy surrounding their computer usage.

The computer may be moved from the visible den to a secluded corner of a locked study, one person may change the password, or cloak all their online activities in secrecy.

If disturbed or interrupted when online, they may react with anger or defensiveness. Household chores ignored - When any Internet user increases his time online, household chores often go undone.

In an intimate relationship, sharing chores often is regarded as an integral part of a basic commitment. When a spouse begins to invest more time and energy online and fails to keep up his or her end of the household bargain, it could signal a lesser commitment to the relationship itself - because another relationship has come between the marriage.

Evidence of lying - The cheating spouse may hide credit-card bills for online services, telephone bills to calls made to a cyberlover, and lie about the reason for such extensive net use.

Most spouses lie to protect their online habit, but those engaging in a cyberaffair have a higher stake in concealing the truth, which often triggers bigger and bolder lies, including telling you they will quit.

Personality changes - A spouse is often surprised and confused to see how much their partner's moods and behaviors changed since the Internet engulfed them.

A once warm and sensitive wife becomes cold and withdrawn. A formerly jovial husband turns quiet and serious. If questioned about these changes in connection with their Internet habit, the spouse engaging in a cyberaffair responds with heated denials, blaming, and rationalization.

Often times, the blame is shifted to the spouse. For a partner once willing to communicate about contentious matters, this could be a smokescreen for a cyberaffair.

Loss of interest in sex - Some cyberaffairs evolve into phone sex or an actual rendezvous, but cybersex alone often includes mutual masturbation from the confines of each person's computer room.

When a spouse suddenly shows a lesser interest in sex, it may be an indicator that he or she has found another sexual outlet.

If sexual relations continue in the relationship at all, the cheating partner may be less enthusiastic, energetic, and responsive to you and your lovemaking.

Declining investment in your relationship - Those engaged in a cyberaffair no longer want to participate in the marital relationship - even when their busy Internet schedule allows.

They shun those familiar rituals like a shared bath, talking over the dishes after dinner, or renting a video on Saturday night.

They do not get as excited about taking vacations together and they avoid talk about long-range plans in the family or relationship.

Often, they are having their fun with someone else, and their thoughts of the future revolve around fantasies of running off with their cyberpartner - not building intimacy with a spouse.

The above article is provided courtesy of Dr. Online Affairs By Dr. Kimberly Young - "Online affairs account for a growing number of divorce cases and it is the most frequently treated problem at the Center for Online Addiction Impairment to real life relationships appears to the be the number one problem A depressive disorder is a "whole-body" illness, involving your entire body, mood, and thoughts.

It affects the way you eat and sleep, the way you feel about yourself, and the way you think about things. A depressive disorder is not the same as a passing blue mood.

It is not a sign of personal weakness or a condition that can be willed or wished away. People with a depressive illness cannot merely "pull themselves together" and get better.

Without treatment, symptoms can last for weeks, months, or years. Appropriate treatment, however, can help most people who suffer from depression.

Depressive disorders come in different forms, just as do many other illnesses. Some types of depression run in families, indication that a biological vulnerability can be inherited.

And even though depression may occur generation after generation in some families, it can also occur in people who have no family history of depression.

According to researchers, certain depressive disorders are often associated with having too little or too much of certain neurochemicals. Psychological makeup also plays a role in vulnerability to depression.

People who have low self-esteem, who consistently view themselves and the world with pessimism, or who are readily overwhelmed by stress are prone to depression.

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